IN THIS Helping To Heal Clinic POST (Vol. 15, #14, 5.19.2015):
* The Five Love Languages: Which ones do YOU speak?
* How Steve Jobs Changed The World-- worth your read...
* Another method of preventing prostate cancer
* More BodyTalk experience
* Does Chemotherapy help breast cancer survival? (not much)
* So, are you coming May 22?
* Are you coming June 29th?
THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES
I first heard about this fascinating book from one of the other participants at the BodyTalk Fundamentals Class in Sioux Falls in early April. I found a used copy, and have been devouring it ever since. If you are engaged, have already taken the marital step, and now sometimes wish that you hadn’t because things aren’t going as smoothly as they were in the Walt Disney version of Cinderella, this book is for you. As someone who has a fair amount of experience with the marital process, I value the information contained therein, and wish that I’d been able to read it before my very FIRST marriage.
We’re all familiar with the different ways of LEARNING: Some of us learn kinesthetically (by hands on), some of us learn visually, some by ear (auditory). So, simplistically, if you tell your spouse you LOVE him/her by SPEAKING THOSE WORDS, that may work if s/he has the same learning style as you do. But if s/he needs to SEE some evidence of your love and all you have are some words, it ain’t gonna cut the mustard. Flowers might work, helping around the home might help.
Gary Chapman’s book, THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES, takes this process a bit further, separating the languages of “love communication” to FIVE:
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION (Thank you for doing that!)
SPENDING QUALITY TIME (Let’s go for a walk...)
RECEIVING GIFTS (Happy Birthday, Honey, here’s something for you...)
ACTS OF SERVICE (Faithfully doing his/her job, day after day...)
PHYSICAL TOUCH (Sometimes “touch” is what matters most...)
Following are a few pages:
Chapter One: “What Happens to Love After the Wedding?”
At 30,000 feet... he put his magazine in his seat pocket, turned in my direction and asked, “what kind of work do you do?”
“I do marriage counseling and lead marriage enrichment seminars,” I said matter-of-factly.
“I’ve been wanting to ask someone this for a long time,” he said. “What happens to the love after you get married?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well,” he said, “I’ve been married three times, and each time, it was wonderful before we got married, but somehow after the wedding it all fell apart. All the love I thought I had for her and the love she seemed to have for me seemed to have evaporated. I am a fairly intelligent person. I operate a successful business, but I don’t understand it.”
“How long were you married?” I asked.
“The first one lasted about ten years. The second time, we were married three years, and the last one, almost six years.”
“Did your love evaporate immediately after the wedding or was it a gradual loss?” I inquired.
“Well, the second one went wrong from the very beginning. I don’t know what happened. I really thought we loved each other, but the honeymoon was a disaster, and we never recovered. We only dated six months. It was a whirlwind romance. It was really exciting! But after the marriage, it was a battle from the beginning.
“In my first marriage, we had three or our good years before the baby came. After the baby was born, I felt like she gave her attention to the baby and I no longer mattered. It was as if her one goal in life was to have a baby, and after the baby, she no longer needed me.”
“Did you tell her that?” I asked.
“Oh yes, I told her. She said I was crazy. She said I did not understand the stress of being a twenty-four-hour nurse. She said I should be more understanding and help her more. I really tried, but it didn’t seem to make any difference. After that, we jut grew further apart. After a while there was no love left, just deadness....
“My last marriage? I really thought that one would be different. I had been divorced for three years. We date each other for two years. I really thought we knew what we were doing, and I thought that perhaps for the first time I really knew what it meant to love someone. I genuinely felt that she loved me...
“After the wedding, I don’t think I changed. I continued to express love to her as I had before marriage. I told her how beautiful she was. I told her how much I loved her. I told her how proud I was to be her husband. But a few months after marriage, she started complaining; about petty things at first-- like my not taking the garbage out or not hanging up my clothes. Later, she went to attacking my character, telling me that she didn’t feel she could trust me, accusing me of not being faithful to her. She became a totally negative person. Before marriage, she was never negative. She was one of the most positive people I have ever met.... but once we were married, it seemed I could do nothing right... Eventually, I lost my love for her and began to resent her..... so we split.”
A strong recommendation to read Chapman’s book-- whether married, thinkin’ about it, or wondering whether you should have done it. You can pick up a used copy at Amazon.
HOW STEVE JOBS CHANGED THE WORLD
NEW YORK (CNNMoney) — In a powerful commencement address to George
Washington University graduates, Apple CEO Tim Cook implored the class of 2015 to
follow in the footsteps of Steve Jobs.
Many view work as boring, hopeless drudgery — a view Cook said he shared in 1997
before he came to Apple.
But Cook said Steve Jobs made him question everything he thought was true. Jobs
persuaded him that "doing good and doing well" were not mutually exclusive.
"I always figured that work was work," Cook said. "There were things I wanted to
change about the world, but I figured that was what I had to do on my own time. Steve
didn't see it that way. He convinced me that if we made great products, we too could
change the world."
As an example, Cook pointed to features on iPads, Macs and iPhones that allow blind
people to communicate with their friends and family.
On how to change the world: Cook also referred to citizen journalists who use their
smartphones to capture and report police brutality. He got loud applause when he said
that Apple products can empower people who witness injustice, because people now
have a camera in their pocket all the time.
"At Apple, we believe the work should be more than about improving your own self; it's
about improving others' lives as well," Cook said. "We believe that a company with
values and acts on them really can change the world."
On meeting George Wallace and Jimmy Carter: Cook said his moral compass was
tuned when he met both Alabama governor George Wallace and President Jimmy
Carter as a high school student in the summer of 1977.
Apple's CEO was born into a poor family in Alabama, and by the time he was in high
school, he still hadn't left the south. But he said meeting the segregationist Wallace
"was not an honor for me."
"Shaking his hand felt like a betrayal of my own beliefs, like I was selling a piece of my
soul," Cook said of his introduction to the notoriously racist governor.
Instead, meeting Carter was more of a highlight for Cook. Though Carter had been the
governor of another, bordering southern state (Georgia), and like Wallace was a
Democrat, Cook said Carter approached life differently. He was "kind and
compassionate," Cook said.
"One was right, and one was wrong," Cook said of Carter and Wallace.
On Steve Jobs and the 'North Star': Cook's advice to the graduates of the class of 2015
was to use their own morality as their guides. He encouraged them to have Jobs'
optimism that work could better the world, and he urged them to embody Carter's
humanity -- something Cook said the president "had not sacrificed" despite holding the
highest job in the world.
"Your values matter. They are your North Star," Cook said. "Otherwise it's just a job, and
life is too short for that. The sidelines are not where you want to live your life. There are
problems that need to be solved and injustices that need to be ended."
Cook ended his address by taking a photo of the graduating class with his iPhone.
Sunday's speech was the first commencement address delivered by an Apple CEO
since Steve Jobs spoke at Stanford University's graduation in 2005. Cook also delivered
a commencement address at Auburn University, his alma mater, in 2010, when he was
Apple's chief operating officer.
This story was first published on CNN.com, "Tim Cook: How Steve Jobs changed the world”
ANOTHER METHOD OF PREVENTING PROSTATE CANCER
Ejaculation was a method recommended years ago by natural therapies MD Dr. Andrew Weil on his website. Then, the conservatives must have told him that recommending this method was not politically correct, so I have not heard much on that from him since. But now the latest research suggests those who ejaculate more frequently have less risk of prostate cancer--about 20% less so. Go to www.medscape.com, May 17, 2015 for more.
MORE BODYTALK EXPERIENCE
Worked with another BodyTalk client a few days ago. There were some issues with anxiety associated with body image, so worked on all of that. I’ve come to believe that the decisions we make about health care, when to buy groceries, who to call on the phone and when, who to accept a date with, tend to be very INTUITIVE decisions, a kind of “inner knowing”, that might not stand up in a court of law, but which we use every day. In BodyTalk, practitioners are trained to USE the intuition in a deliberate way, to help guide them in balancing the client’s body toward better health. I’m concluding there is a good deal of merit to this new modality.
DOES CHEMOTHERAPY HELP BREAST CANCER SURVIVAL? (not a heckuva lot...)
I just had a call from “J”, a lady who lives 75 miles to the northeast. She was searching for additional help for her recurring breast cancer. She has spurned traditional treatments for it. I tend to agree with her; the research suggests that chemotherapy is not very effective for increasing survival time for breast cancer-- According to the published research, Clin Oncol 2004 Dec; 16(8): 549-60, the percentage of increase in the number of breast cancer patients surviving 5 years, DUE to their taking chemotherapy as part of their protocol, was 1.4%. Large doses of vitamin C can be hepful for breast and other cancers if done correctly. Sometimes it’s done by I.V., sometimes it’s done orally. I.V. administration seems like a great idea, but unless it is done continuously, the cancer cells have a chance to recover-- the lifetime of ordinary vitamin C in the body is about 5 hours. We use oral administration, with the right kind of liposomal vitamin C. The liposomal form (wrapping a body lipid around the vitamin C molecule for better absorption) has the potential to maintain a continuous high level of vitamin C in the body. I support that, IF it’s the right kind of vitamin C-- we avoid vitamin C made from GMO corn as a feedstock. Vitamin C from Cassava root seems to work better.
ARE YOU COMING TO THE MAY 22ND COMMUNITY ACCESS BODYTALK PROGRAM?
Hey, it’s only about 90 minutes long, and you’ll learn much about how this very safe, very holistic therapy works. It starts at 7 pm in the evening, at our Tracy MN clinic, Friday, May 22nd. Come and learn self care for your mind/body and that of your family. It’s FREE, and you may even win a free BodyTalk session. It’s definitely a better deal than your health insurance.
ARE YOU COMING TO THE BODYTALK ACCESS PROGRAM?
We’re sponsoring a one day program on June 29th, to teach you about selfcare, the BodyTalk way. It will be held at our clinic, second level, 9 to 5. Cost is about $135 if you register before May 29th. Go to www.bodytalksouthdakota.com, click on “Seminars”, select the BodyTalk Access class in Tracy on June 29th. If you get sick and encounter those huge medical bills and need to take time off work, you’ll wish you had learned about this safe approach.
TESTIMONIALS FOR BODYTALK?
Go to https://www.bodytalksystem.com/ and click on “Testimonials” at the top of the page.
ALL FOR NOW. Keep smiling, no matter what the politicians tell you. We’ll get through this global warming thing, if it takes another hundred years...!
Charles Reinert ND, PhD (physics), CHt, EFT ADV, BodyTalk P.I.T.
Helping to Heal Clinic